My hero... or should i say zero..

When i was younger  i thought the one person in my family i could count on, the one person who was the only one who got me to talk when i was in the hospital, the only one who promised he would always be there for me.. was my cousin. he was there the day i was born, and every year through the age of 12.  i have so many memeories of me and him. goin up to our nana's almost every day wwe spent with each other. he looked out for me as if he was my own brother. we told each other everything, we did most everything together. i have to say one of the best memories i have of us was the ditch fights we use to have at my grandparents house. each of us sat on the opposite side of the ditch from each other, pretending we were at war. we had taken pebbles and rocks n threw them as if they were bullets and gernades. haha yeah pretty screwed up but it was great. our nana yelled at us for doin it tho.. after he got into high school everything changed.. we never saw each other as much, never talked as much, it seemed i had lost my best friend but i still thought he was the best, the greatest, he was my idol. when i got to high school, he looked out for me n had his friends do the same. but through the years we've lost touch and he changed into something he promised he would never be. he had two choices and he took the wrong one, i dont know why because it's not who he is and i know that for a fact. i still love him but he makes me think less of him each day, he went from being my hero.. to zero.